“It is well to remember that the entire universe, with one trifling exception, is composed of others.”
John Andrew Holmes
Just over a month ago, I was sitting on my couch watching golf with Graham when my phone lit up. It was a text from my good friend and colleague, O’Neil.
“What’s up, Angelo. Have you read this?”
The attached picture was the cover of the book, Wonder Drug: 7 Scientifically Proven Ways That Serving Others Is the Best Medicine for Yourself.
I replied that I hadn’t read it and asked if he recommended it. His reply, “Big Time.”
Although I immediately ordered it, I was working through a couple of books and had a few more sitting on my desk that I felt needed to remain ahead of it. But I’ve been itching to read it.
This afternoon, I got to scratch that itch a bit and read through the first few chapters. Already, there’s so much power in the words of Trzeciak and Mazzarelli. Here are two excerpts I found particularly impactful.
What is the key to emotional and mental resilience?
Relationships.
What is the key to better relationships?
Giving of yourself.
So good. Right? Here’s the other:
A late-middle-age male patient was hours from death with a sudden brain bleed. His daughter’s wedding was just weeks away. She knew that his dying wish would be to be there at their wedding. So our amazing nurses made it happen, right then and there, and put together an impromptu wedding. They got creative and used IV tubing for rings and used an old pound cake from the back of the break-room freezer to make the ceremonial cut. The flowers came from a willing donor on another floor. One of the nurses was an ordained pastor, which was lucky. He jumped in to officiate the wedding.
Everyone who was there said that their hearts broke for the family, but their hearts were also filled. Any of the nurses and doctors who gave up their time and energy to pull this off could have said, “My shift is over. I’m too tired. It’s not my job.” But the entire unit banded together and did their part to do a great thing for a dying man and his child. Each one of those people was focused on the daughter, her fiancé, and the patient, not on himself or herself.
I’d be willing to make this bet:
The greatest leaders are the greatest servants.
The greatest leaders – the ones who bring out the best in people and who get the strongest organizational results over time – are the greatest servants – people who set aside their own needs for the sake of tending to the needs of the team.
You’ll notice I didn’t define serving as “giving others what they want.” That would be just as unhealthy as getting everything we want. In fact, some organizations with poor culture and workplace climate find themselves in difficult predicaments precisely because leaders are busy trying to give everyone what they want. That’s not leadership; that’s enablement, and it’s cancerous.
True servanthood and, by extension, true leadership is about putting the good of others ahead of ourselves. It’s about seeing what’s needed and coupling that with a genuine desire and willingness to “go” and “do.” It’s giving someone who’s hungry a fish to eat in their moment of need and teaching them how to fish for a lifetime, especially when it costs us something.
Earlier this week, I got to see this all-too-rare vision of leadership in action. My best friend, Mauricio, scored opening reservations for us to have dinner at a swanky, highly anticipated restaurant in Charlotte on Thursday night. It was an incredible night full of amazing food and amazing conversation, all of which I covered in a social media post later that night. But there’s something I noticed throughout the night that I didn’t share in that post. I wanted to save it for later. For now. For you.
From the moment we arrived and throughout dinner service, I took notice of the restaurant’s owner, Katy, working alongside her team. She qualifies as a successful leader because of what she and her husband, Joe, have built: a portfolio of world-class restaurants here in Charlotte.
What struck me most about her, though, was what I observed her doing most: standing off to the side and looking, through her perfectly placed clear-framed glasses, for what needed to be done. On a night when it would have been easy to stand in the light of the front, she stood off to the side and looked for opportunities to stand in the gap and serve. Undoubtedly, much of what she was doing was executive-level observing, looking for operational inefficiencies and opportunities to enhance the experience for future guests. But that didn’t stop her from serving alongside her team.
The moment that most exemplified this was when Kasey got up to use the restroom. As Katy walked by, she noticed that Kasey had left her napkin in her chair. She walked over to our table and silently folded the napkin. When we offered our thanks, she simply smiled and walked away, looking for the next opportunity to serve her team.
Servant leadership often reveals itself not in grand gestures, but in what we notice and choose to do when nobody expects us to do it.
If that act of service was not great leadership, I’m not sure what is.
#ChooseToBeGreat
Angelo
CHOOSE TO BE GREAT 